We reach out; to that someone whom we long for. We all do; because we feel lonely. Where does this loneliness come from? Who do we expect to come take care of it? How desperate do we suddenly feel? Why is it that, this sudden rush of lonesome blues turns our dignity & pride into instant dust? How can we be so spontaneous in picking up the phone and calling up simply anyone, text them, saying: hey, how are you? Had we not gotten rid of them? Had we not made a promise to our glorified self to stay independent in every sense of the word? Did we not-at some point-mention feelings of a super-glorified self which would strive, forever more until that lacked light was at the door?
What happens then, in that minute moment, where despair is the only company that remains by our side? Where does the fear of being left out there alone come from? How can it be? Makes you wonder, does it not?
All we are ever after is the feeling of being home; where we feel very safe, cozy and warm. the knowledge of having your skin touched by the hands of a guardian of hope. the sensation of their fingers upon your bare skin in that moment in the morning, when all you need is the assurance that you are not alone. that is ALL we are after, at the end of the day, when all our ‘concerns’ have shrunk into one.
May we find home someday. may we be happy, however that would feel. may we be not loners, lonely people; who seek someone far away. we needn’t worry though, I’m aware! someone certain will be there; a lover or a friend; or yet another loner at the gate; will be waiting, they’re awaiting all the feelings that we seek. it’s just a game, a nasty game. this mind, has forever been filled with the poison of thought. it’s time to let go of all that and simply, merely love.
© Sina Saberi – 21 July 2013