All My Tea

Under the blanket, I’m so cold; I’m trying to get warm and cozy up, but it’s just so cold. It’s lonely and gloomy and cold; so cold.

The tears ready to come down, are anticipating the sobs which have blocked the air I must breathe. The loneliness of this cold night just remains, like a stench that makes me nauseous and pains my nostrils and brain. My heart, it aches.

I cry, knowing that crying is the only thing that could have a shot at easing this pain my heart just can’t seem to bear; this loneliness that just draws its claws nearer around my teeny, feeble heart that’s about to perish soon.

Why, almighty did you become so cruel? You, once used to ease my pain and take away my sorrow, not add salt to my constant, never-ending injury! I have to ask, almighty, why did you make so many of us if you simply intended for us all to end up being lonely in our sorrow?

Almighty, why did you grant me this clumsy heart if you knew you were to inflict this much pain onto it? Was it fair to you? IS it fair to you?

Oh almighty, I hate you if I may, for you weren’t there for me when I needed you the most. God almighty, I despise you for keeping the knowing just for yourself and all the darkness and the unknown for me. I can’t loathe you more for not letting me be in the light and the joy of life, Always!

Almighty, I wish to cry; just keep those tears coming; let thy clouds gather and pour down what can’t be kept inside any longer. Set them free almighty, please let them run wild; that’s how you made them once.

Under my blanket, I’m so cold; it’s just very cold. I’m feeling nauseous, I wanna throw up. These demons, these filthy, fiendish demons shall have me if they desire. Darkness can corrupt me, hell can sink me in and death shall overcome.

Death shall fill me up, take me down.

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