When you’re a child you’re all stupid and naive not knowing shit about life.
Inside your tiny little (in most cases) head, you’ve got this bizarre thing going on thinking you’re SO unique. One in a million.
You create these imaginary weird thoughts about all those around you. Afraid of those you can’t talk to. Inseparable from those who share with you. The world is not such an honest place and anything or anyone further than 10 feet from your house or even worse your room is a definite stranger; Mysterious and gloomy.
You have these surreal moments which from the eyes of adults will seem so fucking ordinary but you’re the one that truly grasps the divine eeriness of it all; even as a kid the nostalgia is easily felt and expressed through your actions.
And even though everyone’s like “Oh, How innocent.” “How Pure!” deep deep down (actually more like “just down”) you know you’re not so sterile after all. you’ve got your own secrets. well obviously to the extent that you’re short life experience suffices.
You lie so much but they call it stupidity. you cheat and it’s naivety. you nag and they say “well, he’s a child!” you are free to commit anything that is generally or politically wrong and incorrect, BLAMELESSLY!
As you start growing up, you tend to get a bit insecure. before that you knew you but suddenly you feel as if you’ve gotta define a new YOU all over again. and so begins your long acting career.
you lie, cheat, envy, act.
I mean on the outside you’re this magnificent splendid beautiful human being but you and only you truly know what’s happening on the inside.
You find friends. not those you only pass the time with but those you choose cause you know you’re gonna learn something from; those who may not be so caring but it doesn’t matter cause you’re here to learn. you prioritize them; the ones I wanna learn about life from; the ones i wanna learn about friendship and love from and so forth….
This is actually the best part cause you, for the first time face the real you. you find the weaknesses (this time buried deep deep down) and if you’re lucky enough you learn to live with them and if not, well I hear the acting business is still working pretty well.
You know, whether you learn to live with these flaws or not doesn’t matter. the thing is, by the time you learn all about their existence you doubt. you realize how much you DON’T know and how INcomplete you actually are. you’ve made this apparent facade which seems so convincing on this rusty old mind. you feel weak…and helpless. you start nagging (mostly to those you shouldn’t!)
Wait a minute…Are we still talking about you? or is it a CHILD we’re describing here? what’s the difference really? I’d rather stay a child as long as I could. we all hate the naivety, the stupidity, the unbearable selfishness and the mind-numbing, never-ending irrationality! but at the end of the day we do welcome an occasional cheating. a casual lie. or is it just me?
Just as long as we remember that we’ll always be children the world will be but a playground to enjoy.